Self-Sorting of Parishes by Belief is a Bad Thing

It’s not a good thing to self-sort ourselves in parishes according to our beliefs.  The usual reason is to be with people who think the way we do, and to avoid people whose views we don’t like.  When we do this, though, we miss out on the chance to learn from our disagreements.  We lose that opportunity to fine-tune our contributions to God’s on-going creation of the universe. 

Some think this kind of self-sorting is happening in American politics.  It’s definitely happening in the Episcopal Church and Anglican Communion, where implacable traditionalists want to split the church because of differences over theological speculations.  At Entangled States, Nick Knisely points us to a New York Times article, The Elephant in the Room.  The article describes how Americans are increasingly socializing solely with people who share their political views.  Fr. Knisely sees a similar phenomenon happening in the Episcopal Church and Anglican Communion, and thinks it’s a bad idea.  He’s right on both counts. 

A good bit of this self-sorting phenomenon seems to be happening at the parish level.  In my own parish, traditionalists have immigrated from so-called liberal parishes.  A number of my moderate- and liberal friends have gone in the other direction.  As a result, our parish seems a lot more theologically conservative than it did 10 years ago. 

About a year ago, a friend and I were in the parish hall chatting with our bishop, Don Wimberly of the Diocese of Texas, who was there to do confirmations.  I told him we appreciated the challenges he was facing in trying to deal with so many divergent views within the diocese.  I explained that my friend and I were theologically more liberal than the majority of our parish, so we had some idea what it was like to try to co-exist with people we disagreed with.

The bishop immediately responded that he was glad we hadn’t left our parish.  He said (I paraphrase) that it wasn’t a good thing for people to leave their church homes in search of new ones that they imagined would hold more-congenial views.  That kind of self-sorting, he said, causes parishes to become too one-sided, too polarized.

Here’s a quote from Fr. Knisely:

[I]f we do manage to figure out someway to break the Episcopal Church into two separate provinces, it will be a tragedy not just for the Episcopal Church, but for the Anglican Communion as well. 

If there’s no need to interact with people with whom you disagree, then there is no need to learn to live with difference in your own community. If you don’t learn to live with difference, you quickly lose your ability to tolerate even a little difference. (In other words, once you vote someone off the island, it becomes easier and easier to do again and again until you are in fact the only one left.)  [Emphasis and extra paragraphing added.]

And an excerpt from the Times article (by Anne E. Kornblut, published Oct. 29, 2006):

But as the fissures that opened after the 2000 election have become more extreme over the last six years, the divisions are playing out in small and personal ways, influencing friendships, acquaintances and even family dynamics. In some cases, the divisions have caused painful rifts. In others, they have simply produced a wary quiet.

Many people said they are simply tired of debating the policies that have split the country so thoroughly. They know where they stand; they know where their friends, neighbors and colleagues stand. 

Rather than shift their views or even play along in a show of tolerance, many said they have opted for retreat and the safe harbor of friends who agree.  [Emphasis and extra paragraphing added.]

Comments

3 responses to “Self-Sorting of Parishes by Belief is a Bad Thing”

  1. Fish and Bread Avatar
    Fish and Bread

    In fairness, though, many folks would be religiously homeless without these specialized niche parishes and congregations in Anglicanism and in other religious traditions. It’s a virtue to appreciate diversity and to get along with those you disagree with, but that can sometimes be done, and sometimes should be done, by establishing seperate parishes.
    Let’s give a practical example: Let’s say there are some very liberal folks who are gay and lesbian affirming, non-trinitarian, universalist, use gender-neutral language and consider patriarchal language oppressive, consider many parts of the bible where there are threats and genocides as evil, can’t in good conscience use to the term “Lord” to describe God, believe in non-marital sex as a blessing, practice pantheism, and who don’t believe in sin as theological concept, only in acceptance and love. Meanwhile, they are sharing a parish with conservative Anglo-Catholics who more traditional than the Pope. Obviously, both of these folks have religious views which call them to love one another in some way, shape, or form, but how does a priest practically conduct a liturgy and give a sermon that speaks to both groups simultaneously fifty-two weeks a year plus holy days without watering everything down to mean nothing and having the entire membership leave because they aren’t spiritually fed? On 50% or more of issues, they have directly opposite values, and probably would find the very language of each other’s liturgies offensive, nevermind the sermon content!
    When a handful of issues seperate folks, the approach you outline makes sense, and I do think that’s true in most parishes. But also I think for the extreme fringes at the conservative and liberal ends, co-existence within a single parish is next to impossible. Maybe the same diocese if they have a very understanding diplomatic bishop — maybe.

  2. D. C. Avatar

    Fish and Bread, you’re right that in some cases people have “directly opposite values,” and want to be in separate parishes as a result. I wonder, though, whether such people are coming to church to worship God, or to worship their particular theologies and values.
    I see your point about sermons. There have been times in recent years when I’ve been really irked at my parish’s clergy for preaching nothing but the traditionalist party line. Obviously I don’t mind their believing what they believe. But they’re supposed to be pastors for all parishioners, not just the like-minded. It wouldn’t kill them, from time to time, to fairly and respectfully examine other views from the pulpit.

  3. Topaz Avatar

    D.C. wrote: “I wonder, though, whether such people are coming to church to worship God, or to worship their particular theologies and values.”
    I go to church both to worship God AND to enjoy communion with some folks of like mind and values. Not identical mind and values, but at least some shared commitments and decisions.
    So it can make me awfully weary to be on the progressive end of the continuum and to feel very surrounded by traditional literalists. My hope for a diverse church is that there would be sufficient sub-groups that I can at least enjoy some community now and then with people somewhat similar to myself.
    I’m probably not alone in this desire!

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